Monday, August 6, 2012

Doors

My classroom keys jangled as I balanced Target and Dollar Tree bags down the hallway to Room 30.  I stood outside my locked classroom door and peered in.  Do I really want to go in?, I thought.  Opening that door meant that I was no longer a stay at home mom, but a working mom.  Guilt is on the other side of that door.  Guilt for devoting time to my students instead of my own children.  Guilt for organizing my classroom  instead of doing laundry.  Fear was there too.  What if this year brings a child I cannot reach?  How many parents will I manage to irritate?  Part of me wanted to drop my bags and run the other way.  Another part of me knows that despite the guilt, my job blesses my family and in many ways, it blesses me.  
As I walked through the door, I am reminded that we all walk through doors totally unaware of what lies ahead.  We walk through doors where we have to grasp whatever courage we can find and say a prayer to be able to walk out whole and healthy.  The hospital's door.  The counselor's door.  The unemployment office's door.  Yet, we do not walk through doors alone.  The One who knows what lies on the other side walks beside us. In front of us. Behind us.  This week, I am trying to "Be strong and courageous.  Do not be afraid or terrified because of them, for the LORD, your God goes with you, he will never leave or forsake you."  Dueteronomy 31:6  Whatever doors you are walking through this week, I hope and pray you are able to do the same.  

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